Waves
Well, we meet again old friend. When it comes to writing it seems that I have a cyclical nature, which is funny in that the title of this one is waves. To keep a long story short, the reason I'm writing today is not a happy one. Its not to celebrate an epiphany I had while running up a mountain, or a deep thought I've been chewing on for months. This is just some pretty raw thoughts getting put on virtual paper, thanks for tagging along.
I'll be making some religious references today, so if that offends you... I don't really care. I grew up in a religious household and as I grew older drifted from faith, but while I don't actively practice religion I do have belief in some of the underlying values and teachings. Another blog for another day. I recently heard someone talk about the idea of grief and compared it to waves in the ocean. In that while the beach sits there, the waves continually crash onto the grains of sand. Pulling some in, pushing some out. Yet the beach still remains, and the waves still come. Sometimes the waves get bigger, and sometimes the waves are silent. Yet the beach continues to stay, losing some of itself and gaining new grains of sand. This imagery reminds me of a verse that I have tattooed on my back. Matthew 7:24. While I don't know the exact verse anymore, google it, it talks about houses. It speaks about two men, one who built his house on bricks, and one who build his house on sand. After building their houses they were living inside and as the storms came, and the winds and rain poured on their homes. The man who's house that was built on bricks stood the test of time. Where the house that was built on sand crumbled and fell.
So, what does that tell me? Build your foundation strong. Build your network resilient. Find strength in not just your own capacity, but that the bricks surrounding you in your life reinforce and give you more resilience than even your most optimal self would have. Try to know who you are, understand your faults and weaknesses. Work on those, do difficult things, move forward and fall back, love the process, and do the little things. Surround yourself with great people and watch your house grow in size and strength and the ability to take the biggest of waves and biggest of storms. If you want to go fast, go alone... If you want to go far, go together.
It's funny to hear that quote now as I've become addicted to running up mountains. At these races I run, almost all of the race you run alone. You have hours to yourself to let your mind wander, or stare at your watch and count down the hours, seconds, minutes until it's over. While you're out wandering in the wilderness for hours on end, you get these glimpses and moments to see your crew. To help you refuel, give you a boost of motivation, and even just hear you complain about how your toe is bleeding. You see I believe that we NEED each other. We were not meant to be alone forever. We are meant to be with other people and to share experiences and to learn from each other and support each other.
I think that life teaches us lessons in many ways and I also believe that everything happens for a reason. As hard as that is for me to type right now I think that it's a value I've kept near and dear to my heart for a long time. Sometimes when we're in the moment, and we're tied into emotions we can act in fear, anger, sadness and then look back and wish we could have done things differently or seen how things changed us for the better.
What I'd like to end on is coming back to the sand on that beach. You know what really has stuck with me was in the reflection on that statement I heard about those waves. I realized that the beach is still there. I realized that it still has many grains of sand that are from its original self, but also that it has lost a lot of grains to those waves. It has also gained a lot grains from other sands from other beaches, that have also experienced those same waves both big and small. In life we will all experience different types of waves, both big and small. There are people that come into our lives for just short periods of time and some that are there for the entire ride. Sometimes things work out and sometimes they don't, but we can't focus on what we didn't have or why we wished it would have worked out, or that they wouldn't have left. Sometimes, in some instances, they can never even come back. Yet, while they may be gone from your life, from your beach, their memories, their moments, their experiences that you had and shared with them can still live on. The good times, the bad times, and the unspoken hero, the in-between. They say that a candle that burns twice as bright, stays lit for only half as long. Live for those intense burns. Love the fire that roars. Dance in the warmth and laugh in the light, and remember all of those intense moments, deep conversations, and how your life can change forever from just one new grain coming onto your beach. Don't leave words unsaid, don't let things drag out, be transparent, be raw, be authentic and never miss an opportunity to tell someone that you love them.
Love you Benji Noah.
On purpose,
Matt
