Happy

"Yeah college is fun.. but do you ever wish you had your degree, a stable paying job, and a place to settle down in." This was a tweet I recently saw and it made me think of a few things. The first being a body builder (Kai Green), a philosopher (Alan Watts), and an actor (Heath Ledger). What do all of these have in common? Let's talk.Kai Green is a bodybuilder who came from humble beginnings. He grew up in a pretty rough neighborhood and found lifting as a way to express himself and channel his energy. I recently was watching a training session of him mentoring some younger people in the sport of bodybuilding and he gave me some insights. First, most people see someone like him and assume that their capacity for intellectual conversation is diminished due to their "meat head" status, wrong. Second, he spoke with the young bodybuilder about his future and what he wanted. He responded with a typical answer of wanting to turn pro and do all the things he needed to in order to become the best. Kai in another portion of the video talks about something that I think relates to his response as well as to life in general. He says people look at the bodybuilder at the last competition, they see them at the top of the podium, they see all the smiling and contracts and prize money. What they don't see is what it took for them to get there, what sacrifices they've made. The countless hours alone. You only get to see the "happy" moment and say, "that's what I want".Next up is my man Alan Watts. Often found in many a youtube video with some type of inspirational message, cut with some fancy b-roll of an incredible place or some vacation spot (i'm guilty of this). He actually is quite an inspiring person whom I have listened to many a time while on the road during my tenure in the corporate life. The reason I'm talking about him today though is one specific thing he often talks about. "Do you know what comes with what you want?" In reference to Kai, I think this may be one of the most true things in our lives. We get so caught up in the result, the finished product, the award, the prestige, that we often look past what it took to get there. In today's world we live in constant admiration and jealousy of the things that we may not have. In past generations we have never had this problem which is due in large part to social media. We constantly are discontent with what we don't have, rather than what we do have. Whether its someone who is living a lavish life, driving a yacht with 25 incredible gorgeous women, or the "American Dream" of a stay at home mom with the labradoodle and the SUV. We live in a state of constant comparison rather than a state of appreciation.So, lastly we have an actor whom had left too soon. Heath ledger, in my opinion, played some incredible roles in the short time that he was on this earth. I think one of the most famous quotes that he said was the following, "Everyone you meet always asks if you have a career, are married, or own a house as if life was some kind of grocery list... but no one ever asks you if you are happy". Alas, we come to the title (you see what I did there, came full circle from the tweet to this quote, ok shut up matt). Heath died of an overdose on opioids that he had begun taking during his last role in The Dark Knight. I think this happens all to often in Hollywood. We often see a portrayal of an amazing and lavish lifestyle. We often associate money, job status, fancy cars, sick trips, and all these monetary things this what we define as "happy", yet why does it seem that the people in these positions aren't?So, before you start complaining about your situation or look admirably at someone else's situation I think you first need to define the word happiness, for yourself. To me happiness is found in moments, in people, in sharing, in living. It wasn't when I got the pay raise at work, it wasn't buying my first car, and it wasn't the title behind my name on my business card. We often see the things we want and set them as our goals only to realize it wasn't worth the sacrifices we make to get them. It's almost like we romanticize this idea of being happy. We see the shining moments of other people's lives  and feel that ours should be that way at all times. Don't lose yourself in someone else's idea happy in pursuit of finding your own. Finding happiness is in being grateful with what you have, rather than envying what you do not. So before you set your eyes on a lifestyle or a fancy possession ask your self the Alan Watts question, "Do you know what comes with what you want?" because he also has another famous quote,"be careful what you wish for... because you may just get it."On purpose,Matt